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Graduating from a recovery program and becoming an alumnus is an incredible achievement. Whether someone has been through residential treatment after their detox, or have lived in sober communities and are moving back out on their own, there is a great deal of pride that can come with going through with the difficult path to sobriety and emerging with a transformed state of mind and outlook on one’s life. However, just because a program has ended doesn’t mean that someone is “cured” from their addiction, and there can be some unfair expectations that someone can set for themselves in their newfound title of “alumnus.” Managing one’s own expectations, as well as having a conversation with one’s family and loved ones, can help each person set realistic expectations for themselves as well as for their lives going forward after a recovery program.
Continue to Set Realistic Expectations
Setting goals for one’s self that are both reasonable and attainable is an important part of the recovery process, and just because someone has graduated from a particular program doesn’t make this any less true. Having become an alumnus, it can be tempting for someone to want to jump back into their lives, either on a personal front or in a professional sense. However, it is still important to continue to work on building trust between one’s self and their friends, family, and loved ones, as well as understand that getting back into the workforce may not mean that someone is picking up where they left off. Rather than worrying about what job someone has or how much money they make, it is important to first set a reasonable goal for rejoining the workforce altogether. Making goals such as learning to market one’s self successfully in an interview can be a launching point for someone’s new career, or simply holding down a full-time job, rather than worrying about the paycheck.
Setting these goals is important in acknowledging that even after someone has graduated from a recovery program, that doesn’t mean that they are somehow completely “cured” from addiction. There is always a chance that urges will resurface, and it is important to constantly adapt one’s own coping mechanisms and grounding strategies that will come with this transition back into one’s own life. New stressors may present themselves, and old stressors may cause their own cravings. Expecting one’s self to be cured in any way can mean not just failing to acknowledge these difficult circumstances, but also sets an unfair goal for one’s self. Expecting too much out of a person as they are transitioning back into the “real world” can prompt feelings of anxiety, depression, or unfair comparisons about one’s self and their abilities and skills, all of which can have an impact on one’s own self-esteem and the sobriety they worked so hard to achieve.
Talk to Family Members and Loved Ones
Addiction recovery is too often thought of in binary terms. That is, either someone is or is not suffering from an addiction. It is important to have a conversation with one’s family, friends, or loved one’s, especially if they will be living together, about what it means to have attained this sobriety, and that there is always more work to be done to maintain it.
Getting sober doesn’t mean that someone is immune to relapse, or can safely moderate themselves or reengage with dangerous past behaviors. It may be important to explain that it is very risky for someone to go to the bar, even if they are just planning on being the designated driver.
It may also be important to explain that when living together, drinking or drug paraphernalia may be risky to have in the house. Despite the coping mechanisms that someone has developed and successfully implemented, the presence of beer in the fridge or references to drug use may cause unnecessary hurdles, and put someone at risk for a relapse in the future, compromising their hard-earned sobriety.
Graduating from a recovery program doesn’t mean that someone will never struggle with the idea of an addictive substance or behavioral addiction again. Rather, it means that someone has shown that they can successfully implement their own coping strategies and have reached a point of transformational thought process, creating a new mindset that is based around one’s sobriety and taking control of their own future. However, that doesn’t mean that the risks are gone, and having realistic expectations for one’s self in recovery, as well as an open conversation with loved ones and family members, can help someone set themselves up to maintain their positive, transformational mindset while introducing as few hurdles as possible. While joining an alumni program can help someone keep recovery at the forefront of their minds, it is always imperative that someone is cognizant of their own recovery and stressors, regardless if someone has just graduated a recovery program, just begun their recovery program, or are celebrating their tenth year sober.
There are many stresses at every phase of recovery. If you or a loved one are struggling with an addiction or co-occurring mental health disorder, or are looking for additional ways in which you can manage your stresses and expectations as an alumnus, START UP RECOVERY can help you learn practical skills that are pertinent to your unique situation. The apartments available through START UP instill an atmosphere of luxury and fellowship, allowing each person to feel as comfortable as possible as they confront their own vulnerabilities in their lives while also being supported by understanding people. Your time at START UP can be personalized to help you address your own therapeutic approaches and goals in recovery while helping you grow your own skills and brand to achieve these goals in sobriety. For more information on how START UP RECOVERY can help you, or to speak to a caring staff member about your unique situation, call us today at (310) 773-3809.