Back to Blog Posts
During early recovery, it is common to default to negative perceptions about yourself. You are getting to know an entirely “new you” now that you are sober. However, you might dwell over past mistakes you made regarding yourself and your relationships because of this. You might even adopt a negative outlook to believing that your life can never be meaningful.
If you are experiencing such thoughts, you might be using the security of self-victimization to cope with issues you may feel unable to manage. These thoughts and perceptions significantly impact the overall quality of your recovery. It is crucial to understand that these are not uncommon feelings to experience during early recovery. There are effective strategies and practices to embrace a survivor mentality and shift toward an optimistic outlook.
Accept Responsibility
Taking ownership of your decisions in the past and the consequences of your actions is essential to overcoming a victim mentality and addictive impulses. Learning to accept responsibility takes learning about yourself now that you are sober. It also requires focusing on and understanding why you feel and react in specific ways in certain situations. You might look to meditation, mindfulness, yoga, or pursuing a hobby to learn how to express yourself more healthily when overcoming a challenge. Accepting responsibility helps empower you to help yourself by using resources, coping strategies, and skills.
Part of accepting responsibility is learning to accept the mistakes you made in the past and the mistakes you will make in recovery. Remember, mistakes are inevitable and crucial in rebuilding yourself from within and sustaining recovery. Accepting your mistakes will shift your perspective toward an optimistic viewpoint rather than disconnecting yourself because you feel bitter, angry, and want to blame external circumstances for mistakes.
To move forward, you will need to let go of the negative feelings and even forgive others who have made mistakes regarding your relationships with them. When you continue to “stew” over past conflicts in relationships, you allow that person to live “rent-free” in your mind. When you learn to forgive others, you free your mind to focus on things that matter most to you.
Recognize Your Self-Worth
Instead of assuming that you don't deserve to live a happy life by continually repeating negative self-talk or intentionally doing things to harm yourself, you should instead learn how to recognize your self-worth. Starting each day with positive self-talk, whether by keeping a gratitude journal, meditating, or verbalizing what you like about yourself aloud, will help develop a positive outlook and breed confidence. Modifying your thoughts will alter actions and beliefs about yourself and others. With consistent practice, you will feel empowered to let go of the victim role and accept responsibility for what happens in your life. Achieving this will also help you reach both personal and professional goals.
Survivor Mentality
The ability to overcome the victim mentality recognizes that while you might have once felt helpless, you aren't anymore. Now that you are sober, you are a different person. The true essence of maintaining a survivor mentality works in favor of your personal and professional success; this includes attending therapies, building healthy relationships, and practicing self-care.
Making these choices helps to avoid succumbing to negative cycles. It is about having the option and hoping that you will endure whatever challenges you face. Choosing to have a survivor mentality instead of a victim mentality helps you take ownership of your present and future. It allows you to create emotional resilience by rolling with the punches and continuing toward your goals. A survivor mentality creates resilience, and resilience is essential in helping you overcome a victim mentality.
Get Help Along the Way
A person is indeed only as good as the company they keep, which is why it is essential to surround yourself with a network of supportive and motivated people. Having a strong network helps to hold you accountable and understand that you are not alone in your journey. Attending 12-Step meetings such as Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) and Narcotics Anonymous (NA) and finding a sponsor or counselor can help you identify and recognize unhealthy thought patterns.
Partaking in therapy such as cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) can also help you process and overcome negative thought patterns that move you away from victim-centric thoughts. Supportive friends (whether from meetings or not), family members, and counselors can help elevate you and motivate you to attain and sustain a successful recovery.
Freeing yourself from past thoughts and emotions grounded in negative patterns is not easy, but it is necessary for recovery. At START UP RECOVERY, we aim to help you identify and resolve negative thinking patterns attached to a victim mentality. We provide the setting where you can rebuild yourself and your support network to function with confidence when faced with real-world challenges; we want to help transform your life. It all begins with working on your behavior, impulses, and perceptions. Our best success happens when you can become fully realized in fulfilling a meaningful life free from substance use. Achieving a survivor mindset begins with taking the first step toward getting help. At any point during your recovery, if you are struggling to overcome negative thoughts, START UP RECOVERY is available 24/7 to ensure that you always have an option for help. Your health, success, and the ongoing pursuit of recovery should always come first. To learn more, reach out to us at START UP RECOVERY today by calling (310) 773-3809.